In your own words, how would you describe a “John”?
Being a “John” to me – as I see it – also means that I enjoy sex without strings sometimes. I enjoy meeting new people. I enjoy the thrill of the encounter. To me sex is less intimate than other forms of “love”. So, a lot of it comes from just exercising the activity like a muscle. Just getting it out of my system. Relationships go on and on. It’s not a bad thing, but there’s no… closure to it. I like the finality of it sometimes. It’s a finished story.
What do you do for a living?
Professional Graphic Designer.
Where are you from? Is prostitution legal where you live?
The United States and no, it is not legal except in Nevada, but I don’t live in Nevada.
How can you tell the difference between an actual sex worker and an undercover police officer?
It’s about the language you use when talking with/meeting a worker. You don’t mention money specific acts, explicit language, etc. Although, some workers will mention prices with just numbers or slang terms (e.i. flowers, treats etc.). In terms of seeing an ad that you think could potentially be an undercover officer, you can look for ads using explicit language/offering acts that would never be offered up front but more likely in person (i.e. anal, drug use, etc.).
I’ve never felt risk because if you go in knowing you didn’t use explicit language – and then again meeting in person you don’t mention anything explicit until you start the act – you’re in the clear. Plausible deniability. I’ve never tun into law enforcement.
How long have you been a John?
Tell me about the first time you paid for sex.
I had a bunch of extra money from the job I was at during the time and I was interested in trying something new. I wanted to try sex with a girl that was a different ethnicity that I had slept with before (African American) and not often did the opportunity to be with that specific kind of girl come up in my usual women-chasing avenues. I had heard about a site where independent girls posted ads, so I finally took the plunge.
I showed up to the hotel after making the appointment and there were two cute African American girls that greeted me. I went at it with one of them and the thrill of the action itself, mixed with knowing what I was doing was deemed “wrong” in society’s eyes overwhelmed me. After I left, I called the same girl a few hours later and she invited me to come back. I slept with her again and her friend afterwards. It was an excellent time. So, my first experience was a great one, for better or for worse.
Have you ever been in or are you in a long-term relationship?
I have been in several long-term relationships. I’m in one now. I’ve been in two one-year relationships and one four-year relationship. Currently my relationship has gone just over a year.
Does she know about all of these encounters? Are they in the past or maybe she joins you for some?
She does know about all my encounters actually. It was one of the first things I told her about myself. The fact she didn’t and doesn’t judge me on that past life is a big reason why we get along so well. She’s not interested in joining that kind of act – but definitely is into kink fun 🙂
What is the most you’ve ever spent on one session?
Where do these sessions generally take place?
Almost every single encounter involves going to a motel/hotel room the girl is at. A few times have been at massage parlours and a rare couple time I’ve had the girls come to my place.
Massage parlours. Do you find them on the internet? Or is there some sort of telltale signs that give away that kind of massage parlour?
Honestly? Almost any Asian Massage Parlour is going to offer happy endings. The only ones I think that wouldn’t, would be located in busy commercial areas. There are websites that can point you to them, but usually if it’s a parlour at the bottom of an apartment complex with other small businesses, you’re going to get the option. Any place that offers a “table shower” is your sure-fire sign of where it will happen.
Do you have a type?
Physically, no. I’ve been with all colors, ages and sizes. I’ve gone through different phases of types, but never settled on one. I’ve never been a big fan of white women though. In terms of personality – I’ve always preferred girls that aren’t “all business”. I’m not necessarily looking for the “Girlfriend Experience”, but there is psychology involved in sleeping with someone that often benefits from a positive personality.
What ethnicity are you?
I’m Caucasian (white).
When you say you prefer women who aren’t “all business”, could you describe what “all business” entails?
All business means the worker wants you to get hard then and there without her doing almost anything to help and then you have sex and leave. Usually they don’t like to have sex in multiple positions and keep some clothing on.
Another sign would be someone who tries to get you in doggy right away, because many men tend to cum the quickest in that position. If you’re on your way to getting hard, but aren’t quite there yet – they aren’t going to help you. You need to come fully ready and prepared to go. They’ve got other clients lined up as soon as you’re out. I’ve had men knocking on the door before, near the end of a session. Talk about a mood killer. SOme guys prefer this though, it’s just not my thing.
What sort of things are you into?
Sometimes massages, but mostly just oral and regular sex. Once in awhile I would try anal, but I’m not a huge fan. It was always a psychological thing to see if the girl would do it. Position wise? Regular ones. Missionary, doggy, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, etc. Nothing super complex and nothing off the wall.
What is your number? In this sense, I mean the number of women you estimate you’ve had sex with.
I’ve had sex with roughly 120 women. I’d say about 50% were girls I met in college, bars, online (usually Craigslist), clubs, activities, etc. The other 50% were workers.
I’m impressed, that means you’ve picked up sixty women who aren’t sex workers. Do you have any tips for guys?
Confidence is everything. Women can sense it from miles away if you are or you aren’t. It also helps to be somewhat attractive and have a decent job/profession. Don’t live at home with your parents either. I’d also suggest don’t talk a lot – or at least give away all the interesting stories about yourself up front or too quickly. Everyone likes a little mystery or to learn more and more about you over time.
The less you talk, the less chance you’re going to talk yourself out of a situation with a girl. It keeps the initial attraction she has for you first based on looks and small conversation. The fact you hold back will impress the subconscious because it shows you have discipline and control as a person.
Have you ever hired more than one woman? If so, what is the most women you’ve slept with at once?
Yes, I’ve had a threesome once. That’s it. I have had sex with more than one girl on the same day before on many occasions though.
Have you ever fallen for a woman you’ve hired?
No, but I really connected with a girl one New Year’s Eve. We had an interesting connection and she ended up not charging me. That was a first and last.
Tell me about your worst experience as a “John”.
A few times (not many) I’ve been either rushed and couldn’t get it up or one girl tried to scam me. Usually white women, hence my dislike for that type.
Care to elaborate on the woman who tried to scam you?
Only a few times. One time a worker (white) was very aggressive on the phone when I was pulling up because she thought I was another guy calling her back that was angry with her – I should have seen the red flag, but I was already at the hotel and for the record, I’d never treat a worker any less than decent and just as kind or understanding as any other girl I wanted to sleep with. So, when she realised I wasn’t that guy, she invited me up. Almost immediately after the girl hopped right on, within two seconds grabbed the condom and pulled herself off saying that it broke, (it didn’t because I’ve been in situations where it has). Her friend (a second girl there) told me I have to get out and this was the second or third time that day this happened (which there’s no reason why she should be sleeping with more men if she thought that happened earlier).
I called them out on it and the girl started getting aggressive. She said I seemed the type who would last more than five minutes anyway (she was pretend crying no more than a minute or two before). The fact her friend gave me back half my money seemed like a clear indicator there was some guilt there. I would like to mention I was still respectful and didn’t name call or worse to either of them. I just left. I didn’t want trouble.
Tell me about your best experience as a “John”.
The best experience would have to be the New Year’s Eve session. I was on a break with my girlfriend at the time. The girl was breathtakingly beautiful and very into me. We ended up going at it for an hour or so longer than usual. Her friend kept calling her but she told her she was still enjoying her time with me. In the end, she didn’t charge me even though I protested it (I didn’t just quickly say “yes”). It was amazing sex as well.
Is there anything else you get from these experiences aside from sex?
The thrill of danger. The high of doing something that I know I shouldn’t be.
Is there anything you regret over the years?
The times I slept with a women without a condom. Both with workers and with girls I’ve met through legitimate avenues. I’ve remarkably never contracted and STD, but I’ve gotten a few scares that remind me not to be so reckless.
Any final thoughts?
Only that I don’t see this “past life” or “hobby” as a proud one to brag about. I’d rather just enlighten people to it. It’s a dangerously addictive path that several friends I know who have been interested I’ve dissuaded from. It stems from the fact I have an addictive personality and several psychological issues in the sexual realm earlier in life.
I’m not a man who believe that numbers mean you’re more of a man than other – or better at getting women (regardless of workers or not). It doesn’t mean I judge it either. I believe a woman’s body is her choice to do with it what she wants and that if prostitution was legal than our law enforcement would have an easier time fighting real human trafficking.
Many men/women sometimes just want sex and nothing more – and to walk away. This is what workers offer. I’d caution anyone who is considering their first time to really think long and hard about what they are doing. There are plenty of other ways to meet and find girls to sleep with – with no strings attached even in one day. If you’re in a relationship with someone, think about the consequences that it may have on them as well if they were to either find out or if you got a disease and passed it on. Just don’t make the decision lightly. Hope this helps and was informative.